Chee Ping

2011-12-23T20:46:00.002+08:00

Time to refresh my blog. Well. Can't really count back how long I've never been blogging. Recently, I got know a filipina named Chona Dira Romorosa from an online chat community. Erm, she is quite a nice girl with similar background to myself though I don't know to believe her or not because never the less she is from the philippines and she did indeed ask me for financial help before. Therefore it is hard to trust her. Well, I'll see how things goes, because she said she wanted to be my girlfriend but there is a communication gap, the accent we speak are so different and she is so far away. Will this even do?

2011-07-30T15:12:00.002+08:00

Haven't been blogging for god knows how long it is. Well, I'm still in NS, not able to quit for another year. Now, I get why people are trying to avoid army as much as they can. They do too many redundant stuffs but then I shall not list it out. I'm too tired to do any physical activity after I bookout nowadays, with no where to go, don't know who to contact. All the former close friends seems uncontactable. NS just ruins my kind of good life.

For now I guess I probably wants to survive the Taiwan first.

formspring.me

2011-05-16T20:10:00.001+08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/SiahCP

2011-03-13T16:56:00.001+08:00

Oh MAN! How long has it been since I updated my blog. Well, I think it's since before enlistment. Now in NS, I really hate it. Life is so monotonous, you book in sunday, wait for bookout on friday, book out only give you 48 hrs of freedom. damn!

2010-08-06T16:32:00.001+08:00

Finally, VIVA over. Time to update blog.

Well, good news, TP test coming up, 1 time pass, take driving lesson then go on driving!!

2010-07-15T13:51:00.003+08:00

2010-05-26T15:31:00.000+08:00

Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blind-folded fear.
Thomas Jefferson

2010-03-31T11:20:00.002+08:00

Eh! Come On! Why you haven't go work!!!?

Oh my! Spare me la! I'll eventually go work when the time comes. I don't wanna be no-life working through my life from polytechnic. I was like WTF! I'm a teenager, so what if my father is not around? That doesn't make a difference...I don't even take money from you...and there you are nagging the hell out of me...this is ridiculous, and what about my friends? They don't smoke, they don't loiter at void decks, what do you call that? Delinquents exactly right? My friends are not delinquents, we do sometimes work, just a matter fact, we do enjoy, but we don't always have to slog our lives out working do we? It's not about how hard you live, its about how smart you live...

2010-03-21T13:19:00.001+08:00

I lost my bicycle...I'll be glad if somebody buys one for me...

I love this song! (Show too) Show Highly recommended!

2010-03-04T00:27:00.001+08:00

2010-03-03T15:15:00.000+08:00

Take the Supernatural Character Quiz

Shed your pretense.

2010-03-02T21:17:00.002+08:00

Come on! Do you think I'm an idiot or still a kid? When I don't speak,you said I don't treat you all as family, but when I speak you told me off. Don't give me the bullshit crap that you are having difficulties there. Oh shut up! I have to work to support my own livelihood! I can't live life as a normal kid! Who gives you the right to scold me when I haven't scold you? So what if you are my dad? Fifth uncle is there, isn't he? You want your face but now you talk crap? Shed the pretense, you are hopeless, who in the first place tell you to go there? If its so good there you wouldn't complain.

2009-12-31T11:52:00.002+08:00

First of all, Happy Birthday! Seet Hao!

It always been a long gap between my posts, I somehow couldn't blog as much as I do in the past. It is maybe I seldom procrastinate now. Maybe I should, Maybe not, well, I don't know...haha! Nothing really special happen except a partial class gathering yesterday, we went to breeks to eat then went to loof; a pub on top of supper club. Hey! I'm not a kid, I only rarely drink, wasn't that bad after all, least I never go "ba po" straight after drinking. It's kinda boring, perhaps just for me, I don't really know how to strike up a conversation, or perhaps I really don't care about what others are doing. I don't really like to talk to people except close friends. Sometime I longed to have a more eventful life. Sometime I just wish to be in this current peaceful life, nothing much...nothing less. Just spare me the troubles, I'll be hopefully happy.

Love???
问世间情为何物？爱情到底是什么感觉？人人都说是一种特殊的感觉但是我不晓得。常问自己嘛,那位气质高昂有着天使般的脸孔，魔鬼身材的女孩看起来很正点。见了一次就夜夜不眠的想着见她。是这种感觉吗？或只是简简单单的想他人的好？这个问号对我来说好像是个解不开的谜底。可是怎么说呢？我觉得这19年的单身也还不错，不必为他人而操心，的确是个满享受的人生。可能这种生活持续下去是好的

2009-12-16T14:19:00.003+08:00

Haven't been updating in a while, I guess my blog has no more visitors. It's dead somehow, actually this isn't a bad idea at all. Might as treat this as a private diary of mine. Well, there wasn't much inspiration or special events happening recently except for a couple of wedding dinner. I guess that's all...

2009-11-21T08:55:00.009+08:00

I highly recommend this show.The characters are so cool!

无情/成余崖(林峰饰)
性格：极为聪明，最擅长理性分析。但高傲自我，看不起他人。率性而为，除对恩师诸葛正我外，对世间事漠不关心，查案也只是随自己喜恶而为。

冷血/冷凌弃（吴卓羲饰）
性格：人如其名，不带感情。自少生长深山之中，行事依赖本能直觉。不喜被人拖欠，也不喜拖欠人，故不喜与人建立任何关系。

铁手/铁游夏/霍义（马国明饰）
性格：热血耿直，极重视感情。正义感强烈，不会怯于权势。了解人性，但相信性本善，判断人时喜从光明面出发。

追命/崔略商（陈键锋饰）
性格：口甜舌滑江湖骗棍。懒散没大志，遇困难一味逃避。自少见惯江湖险恶，阅人眼光锐利。

2009-11-21T08:49:00.001+08:00

I really highly recommend watching this drama.
http://images.blogcn.com/2008/9/22/8/zoekin,20080922201444729.jpg

2009-09-03T23:23:00.002+08:00

I really ,really need a break. Literally a break. Get It! A breather with absolutely no noise (voices, sounds I don't want to hear), no disturbances, not even people (I don't know...changes with time and emotion). Yes, I really need one, why can't people just shut up and let me control my life and be quiet and observe? I don't like to be controlled not even nagged at! Crap! My emotions are all over... my words are turning monsterous and illegible. I don't even know what the hella am I saying!? Just leave me alone....

2009-08-30T10:32:00.002+08:00

<做>

做人就应该做

不会做学习做

学会做自己做

做不熟常常做

做不好耐心做

想要做立刻做

应当做赶快做

成败还是要做

穷时正当要做

富时更加要做

2009-08-16T19:59:00.002+08:00

Nostalgic rain, nostalgic moments. The rain is falling...what a perfect moment to think back. Recently, there have been quite a lot of old events coming into my dreams. Beautiful times, beautiful people. Everything is coming back right up at me. I'm slowly looking and turning back into the old self that I've always been. Quick to boil, careless, no patience. All these rebellious traits. I understood the self-fulfilling prophecy. Somehow, an ominous feeling surrounds me. The good and bad time flashbacks. Is this a prophecy? An upcoming event that is going to turn bad or something. I'm scared to think for the worse.

2009-08-07T01:37:00.001+08:00

2009-08-06T13:17:00.002+08:00

I fear...
I fear I fail my dwa...
I fear...
I fear I didn't help myself...
I fear...
I fear the worst...
I fear being kicked out...
I fear...

2009-07-13T09:17:00.002+08:00

It's been a few days since I've blog. It had been quite miserable and stressful due to the assignments that stacked up when all the deadlines are all about the same time. There weren't anything special happening to me last week, it's quite dead you see. I've been rushing trying to finish the DB assignment since the deadline is today. From wednesday to friday, I've been rushing the database SQL creation codes, it was quite tiring and mind consuming trying to complete 4 peoples' work; all by myself, but I must admit that it's all worthwhile. I've learnt a lot more since by trying to be as independent as could be, at the same time, I do not want them to totally grasp nothing, but I still fear for ester and qiu xuan because they are quite in a daze sometimes. Ya, anyway...JT, you don't need to feel bad about me doing the whole database and data dictionary, It's ok. Hah, I remember Yi Jie telling me don't say a word unless some others take initiative. Well, I can't do that, I can answer to myself it's ok, but my conscience wouldn't allow it.

In my spare time, in between my self-given breaks I would occasionally play DOTA and think about some stuffs. It's quite private but doesn't matter, I don't want to be invisible but tranparent. I've grown to be more cautious. I couldn't exactly describe it but maybe some actions and some eyes around are cautious that is influencing me to do likewise. I don't know, my words are not sensitive but I like observing people's expressions, micro-expressions. Somehow, trying to analyse something there...

公是公，私是私
我知道私底下你还是很讨厌我
但是我还是要说声‘对不起’

2009-07-11T10:47:00.002+08:00

Simple Plan

Your Love Is A Lie

I fall asleep by the telephone
It's 2 O'clock and I'm waiting up alone
Tell me where have you been?
I found a note with another name
You blow a kiss, but it just don't feel the same
Cause I can feel that you're gone

I can't bite my tongue forever
While you try to play it cool
You can hide behind your stories
But don't take me for a fool

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know
Your love is just a lie
(Lie)
It's nothing but a lie
(Lie)

You look so innocent
But the guilt in your voice gives you away
Yeah you know what I mean
How does it feel when you kiss when you know that i trust you
And do you think about me when he fucks you?
Could you be more obscene?

So dont try to say you're sorry
Or try to make it right
Don't waste your breath because it's too late, it's too late.

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know,
Your love is just a lie
(Lie)
It's nothing but a lie
(Lie)
You're nothing but a lie

You can tell me that there's nobody else
(But I feel it)
You can tell me that you're home by yourself
(But I see it)
You can look into my eyes and pretend all you want
But I know, I know
Your love is just a lie
(Lie
I know you're nothing but a lie
(Lie)
Lie
(Lie)
Lie
(Lie)
Lie

Your love is just a lie

2009-07-07T09:21:00.002+08:00

This illustrate my thoughts of thinking. I tend to jump in between the 2 dimension of thoughts outside the 'BOX'. That's explain why most of the time my language is irrational, not thought through.

2009-07-05T18:20:00.002+08:00

A vow of silence does not mean to become mute and not to speak at all. It consists in: (1) self-imposition of periodic silence; (2) not indulging at any time in injurious and untruthful speech; (3) not giving way to useless speech; (4) not asking questions on philosophy or practice till what has already been taught or is before us is fully scanned and thoroughly looked into from the point of view of our particular questions; (5) not indulging in ahankaric speech, i.e., not making statements about the Divine Self or Ego in terms of our kamic or lower nature; (6) not indulging in injurious speech regarding our lower nature, our own faults and weaknesses, lest by speaking of them we lend them the strength that ensues from the power of speech; (7) not to speak even that that is true unless at proper times, to proper people, and under proper circumstances.

Thou shall consider the vow as an act of penance. As an act of great remorse and sin. I shall ceased speak unless neccessary, but I don't know the challenge set on myself, how difficult for me, since the open and lonely soul of mine fonders to speak.

2009-07-05T13:34:00.001+08:00

Yes! Finally finished the codes for the creation of tables for DB

2009-07-05T11:37:00.000+08:00

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say

But trying to be genuine was harder than it seemed
But somehow I got caught up in between

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say

But trying to be someone else was harder than it seemed
And somehow I got caught up in between

Between my pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way

And things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none

Let me apologize to begin with
Let me apologize for what I'm about to say

But trying to regain your trust was harder than it seemed
But somehow I got caught up in between

Between my pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way

The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none

And I cannot explain to you
And anything I say or do or plan

Fear is not afraid of you
But guilt's a language you can understand

I cannot explain to you
And anything I say or do
I hope the actions speak the words they can

For my pride and my promise
For my lies and how the truth gets in the way

The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse is

Pride and my promise
Between my lies and how the truth gets in the way

The things I want to say to you get lost before they come
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none
The only thing that's worse than one is none

2009-07-05T11:34:00.002+08:00

Lonely is just one word chosen to represent so much
To tell of feelings inside that the senses cannot touch

Lonely can be in the teardrops on a bereaved person’s cheek
Lonely can be in the silence of sorrows too deep to speak

Lonely can haunt a deserted room that Laughter once made proud
Lonely surrounds you when you’re alone or finds you in a crowd

Lonely is heard in echoed footsteps of a departing friend
Lonely penetrates the solitude of nights that will not end

Lonely will not listen to the pleadings of a broken heart
Lonely stays and torments until new Love shatters it apart

2009-07-04T14:34:00.003+08:00

寻找自己，找回该属于自己的性格。最近，似乎上了很多人生的课程。做了很多错事，才明白自己有多肤浅，多窝囊。在某个课友的blog读了些让我自我检讨的篇章。从今天起，我答应自己不要开口除非是在没办法需要说话的时候才开口。我看这是为了避免自己再度说错话。

第五天了，还是对不起

2009-07-02T23:14:00.001+08:00

该死的我说出该死的话还该死的恳求原谅，但真不知所措。还是内疚，对不起

2009-07-02T15:00:00.002+08:00

Currently suffering karmic retribution. Headache plus diarrhoea plus slight fever. Can barely wake up till 12 in the afternoon.

2009-07-01T17:14:00.003+08:00

I blurted my mouth off and never thought through before placing a sentence, and rephrasing it on a tag at jing ting's blog. I realized now that what I said is very very wrong without thinking of the possible effects of hurting you so deeply. I don't what taking responsibility for the situation means but I know I'm a scourge. Must never relate something so absurd to that extend. I regrettably should never said anything. This isn't meant to be any excuse or whatsoever. The fact that I'm writing on this blog may prove that I'm shameless. I'm apologetic for my words whether or not you read this or reply to this. I ought to be scolded sincerely. No denying, I've put it very crudely and very wrong and I shall not provide any excuse or rephrasing. I must at least attempt to express my extreme regret and remorse for my unwarranted actions. I will not attempt to explain or justify my reaction, because I simply cannot defend the indefensible. There is so much more I'd like to say, but there are no words that can convey the incredible shame and guilt that I feel and by all means should feel. I would do anything humanly possible to try and make amends if given the opportunity. I wish to be forgiven, and I promise deeply and truthfully that my crude words will never surface again shall I be given a chance to say "I'm sorry"

对不起...

2009-06-30T10:19:00.002+08:00

Theory of a Deadman - Hate My Life

So sick of the hobos always begging for change
I don't like how I gotta work and
They just sit around and get paid
I hate all of the people who can't drive their cars.
Bitch you better get outta the way
Before I start falling apart

I hate how my wife is always up my ass
She always wants to buy brand new things
But I don't have the cash.

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

How come I never get laid nice guys always lose.
How could she have another headache
There's always some kind of excuse
I still hate my job, my boss is a dick
"I don't get paid nearly enough
To put up with all of your shit"

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

I hate that I can't tell when a girl's underage,
You know, I tell her she's a nice piece of ass,
Then her daddy punches me in the face

So if you're pissed like me
Bitches, here's what you gotta do
Put your middle fingers up in the air
Go on and say "Fuck you!"

I hate my job, all of my rich friends
I hate everyone to the bitter end.
Nothing turns out right There's no end in sight
I hate my life!

So much at stake, can't catch a break
I hate my life
No, it's nothing new hear " it sucks to be you"
I fuckin hate my life

2009-06-26T11:11:00.002+08:00

我不知道何时我开始每天发牢骚。也没什么理由，可能我只是厌倦了我的生活吧... 有时候我真的在想命运真的存在吗？如果命运真的存在岂不是每个人都要把不愉快与不顺自己的事都怪在命运吗？有时候我真的是觉得我该任命了，总有个感觉我不能赚多过200块，每当我赚足了一笔钱，不知怎么了，一定会有东西坏掉。真是命苦啊... 我真的很不想与别人比较，但是我觉得有些东西我应该可以拥有的却死也拿不到。有时候真羡慕那些能够天天出去玩得朋友们，但是太多事我不能够去做都是因为没有钱加上我弟弟已经没有读书了，家里只剩我一个男丁可以依靠了。说得多也没用，没人知，没人理，就算有人知道也不了解...

2009-06-20T01:22:00.002+08:00

Living on is getting irritating as a task...I wished I could just die. That's a wrongful thinking but the burden on me is too heavy. How am I going to go on like this? My life will end in an instance before my physical body will crumble.

How many opportunities had I forgone...how many fun times I missed out...how many friends I fail to make...how many 'adventures' had passed...I wonder, I wonder. I've been through this for 4 years but I am still not accustomed to it. What exactly happened to the carefree, heckcare chee ping? I am trying my very best to bring back my life, bring back what is lost but it's to no avail. Is right to blame it solely on him? Or should I really have harden my heart and swear to never cry. I feel so weak, so useless. I could have done a thing, but as a son, I failed...I done nothing. I came to regret it. Why is it that humans always treasure after they have lost.

Weilun had been ranting that how was it unfair that his dad no longer earn much, his family was not always as rich as before. Your money issues is just a matter of 'wants'. How are compared to me? I guessed you wouldn't understand. (Sasuke is right, naruto wouldn't know a thing, naruto has no close family living)

Is this a test of my determination? Is this a test of my endurance? Was it meant for me to learn to be independent? Was this meant to be for me to learn to control that desire in my heart? Am I mature? Am I childish? Am I EMO-ing or this is the fact? I need an answer. I need comfort but where can I find it? I am just a mere boy. I'm 19, not a boy, not yet a man but I had to do is not every kid on the block can sacrifice. Sometimes, sometimes, I really wished I could be arrogant but what can I be arrogant about?

Jing Ting once scolded me that I shouldn't act like a saint, like I'm always right. Maybe I do it subconcious, I wouldn't want it to happen either. Maybe this is a way of shield I hide under. Just like naruto, maybe I'm trying to prove myself, maybe I trying to find my existence.

Morgan, sometimes, you would asked me to relax but do you know how hard it is for me?I shouldn't get all too agitated, morgan, sometimes I just need a listening ear, somebody to share, to accept my point of view. But thanks anyway, through I did really learn some basics on life.

Mr Lye Chee Wah, I might not have any idea where you are now, but your words really woke me up when I was in primary four, at that time, my dad was still around, I couldn't apprehend why I need to organise, even for my life. As I grow older, I realised, I know. If there could be a day, I could meet you face-to-face, I wished to say "I'm sorry,I didn't oraganise my life. And thank you!" You might not have any idea but you had always been respected and regarded as my mentor wherever I am, however old I am.

Yi Jie, I had a heart to heart talk, with you a few years back. Now I realised why it is good to have a budget and to plan out first.

cherished the one you loved
think before you act
be contented with what you've got, there's always others worse

2009-06-19T01:49:00.003+08:00

2009-06-16T18:37:00.002+08:00

EMOkid at work...at biopolis...

2009-06-15T13:30:00.003+08:00

Went out yesterday night to catch the movie "Land of the Lost". Ok, it's acceptable, laugh scenes...somehow a little lame there...time theory...so on...movie started 11.50pm, ended at 1.30am. Morgan & wei yang decided to take a bus home and to their terror, they forgot it's sunday, no night rider. Hah, was hesitating to take a cab, but they said not worth it, from Cathay Cineplex, walk to Forum Macdonalds, then Wei Yang discovered his Ez-link is missing, then walked back the path all the way back to the cineplex, then to dhouby gaunt. Reaching my physical limits there, then finally they decided to take a cab back to BP...lol...reached home only at exactly 5am...

2009-06-14T22:12:00.002+08:00

Mum and Grandma
Cousins

Da Vinci Exibit at Science Centre

Sakura at Omnitheatre

Cai En & Jiang Feng

Went out at 8.30am and reached shop at 9.30am, damn! I thought the move out time is at 10am, turn out it's 11am. Shouldn't have gone early. Never mind that, worked all the way from 10am, picked up food, equipments and off to hort park. Today's function is a kids' birthday party and oh gosh, the babies are twins and both of them so cute; other kids as well. Ok, I just like being around with kids, they are so innocent and fun to be with.

Next, I ended work at 5.30pm and cabbed down to omnitheatre. I thought I was late for my family dinner, how the heck I know, they haven't even arrived, waste my time, and $. Nothing much to say about family dinner. I was just eating & eating & eating, and perhaps talked a little about the new map 6.60 for dota with my cousin. Ended at around 8pm and reached home at 8.30pm.

Probably will be catching a movie or majong-ing later. So bye ya...signing off...

2009-06-13T09:41:00.002+08:00

Woah~! Good Morning blog and people. It's been a long time since I blogged this early in the morning 9.30am. Well, I'm currently still at joey's place.

Briefly, what happened for yesterday. SS test in the morning, yes,han siang it is damn "hard", all the contents tested were very similar to the class's challenging questions every week. Guessed that studying by the revision guide, point-by-point is proved a little useful. After finishing the exam, went down to board the bus at SIM since my test's block is at block 53. Erm, went home and slack and dota all the way till about 7pm, watch TV, and decided to have laksa at teck whye so I asked morgan to accompany me.

At the meantime, I was there we were to discuss, what is to happen today(saturday) and yesterday night. Initially, the Idea was to Mahjong at my place but people seems reluctant due my grandma.(Thanks!!!Grandma!!!!) Jia xuan could only make it at 3am, supposed we can play at my house, but somehow's morgan's consirate decision + invitation of joey to her place and here I am. And ya, it's joey's mum birthday yesterday, Happy
Birthday! Finally, I can take some time off to slack from studies. If not I think I might be blowing off my top anytime. It's been a long long time to come that I've learnt anger management. Somehow, recently due to occuring cases of misunderstandings, and miscommunication and all sorts, I've gotten back my patience, I wished this can be maintained for long. I think I might go into an all out "heck-care" attitude in order to avoid some trouble.

This is the first time, I've actually started to organise and plan my life a little.

First, sunday work at 10am, End at what time? I had no conclusion(Boss don't like people to ask what time I can go home)

Second, Take pay and maybe get myself a new bike, need to do some calculations on implications; Thanks Dad! The fact I still regard you as dad but don't come to claim I'm your son again!

I think I could plan some activities down for the break. Ya, I think I'm going check out the courts at either school, Timah CC, CCK sports hall, Batok East CC or zhenghua CC. See which one is available. Need to book by next week. I think I will be inviting Qiuxuan, Ching Hwee, ETC...I don't know who...for badminton at the week after next. As for next week, probably, full force chiong at Lavish Dine, who cares I'm an IC already!!! (Hahahahaha!!!! Nose Up! Arrogant!)

I think what's up for today is not decided yet but if anyone's interested in playing badminton, feel free to call me at 91019169. Will be booking for a designated dates, so its either badminton kakakis with qiu xuan and company or just qiu xuan and company. I think that's all...further updates coming up.

(Manga Comments: Damn it!!! Naruto! Please kill Danzo! Sincerely hate this manga character)

2009-06-11T12:57:00.002+08:00

What is exactly happening to me? Really had no idea. Whenever there is a moment of peace, I felt that there are things are left undone. When I'm suppose to concentrate/focus I can't do it...

2009-06-09T22:26:00.002+08:00

Finish the WT today. I guess I wouldn't do very well but I don't want this to become a bad self-fulfilling prophecy.

Haiz...it's common test period and yet I'm thinking of some nosensical,useless and unrealistic dreams again. I'm gotta wake up somehow, I really wished somebody can really tell me off and wake me up. I somehow needs constant pressure and nagging I think. Don't know how I survived through these 19 whole years of my life not feeling a thing but now something is tingling inside, somehow shaken, by who, by what cannot be certain. I just want to remain in solitude. Life is a bore without some adventures but yet I don't seem to be thrilled when there's new happenings, DAMN!

2009-06-09T10:29:00.001+08:00

我很丑可是我很温柔
赵传
每一个晚上
在梦的旷野
我是骄傲的巨人
每一个早晨
在浴室镜子前
却发现自己活在剃刀边缘
在钢筋水泥的森林里
在呼来唤去的生涯里
计算着梦想和现实之间的差距
我很丑
可是我很温柔
外表冷漠
内心狂热
那就是我
我很丑
可是我有音乐和啤酒
一点卑微
一点懦弱
可是从不退缩
每一个早晨
在都市的边缘
我是骄傲的假面
每一个晚上
在音乐的旷野
却变成狂热嘶吼的巨人
在一望无际的舞台上
在不被了解的另一面
发射出生活和自我的尊严
我很丑
可是我很温柔
白天黯淡
夜晚不朽
那就是我
我很丑
可是我有音乐和啤酒
有时激昂
有时低首
非常善于等候
我很丑
可是我很温柔
外表冷漠
内心狂热
那就是我
我很丑
可是我有音乐和啤酒
一点卑微
一点懦弱
可是从不退缩
Does this describe me? I don't know....

2009-06-08T19:34:00.003+08:00

DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!DaMn!
fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!fAcK!
iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!iDioT!

Why you write so slow!!!!????

Marks fly liao la!!!!

2009-06-07T22:15:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since I received some comments on my behavior and actions, it is very beneficial indeed. I need this kind of candid comments to slap me in the face. It will be very nice of people to point out where I exactly offended them. It will be something I will learn from.

Anyway, I'll start posting after CT, meanwhile I'll still be going into research on human communication and maybe I'll be finishing the DWA functionalities during the holidays, if teammates feel like doing a match on the functions it will be very nice to finish things before school starts in order to cope with other modules.

The bottomline, I'm relieved a misunderstanding is resolved, I hope there won't be another.

2009-06-07T13:16:00.002+08:00

Let's summarize what's on for yesterday. Woke up 8.00 am, and arrived at batok at 9.15 am. How did I know that stupid alfred changed put the move out time at 9 am and he told me to arrive at 9.30, luck enough I arrived early. Anyway, it's kinda slack function, so it finish at around 4pm. Got to be the food runner today. So somehow it means slack. Basically, what's there to worry about? Ha, yes, talked with boss richie , had a nice chat, thanks boss for the praise, I'll continue to work hard, 1 family is behind me to support, you are very right, I should just ignore that good for nothing person, move on and work as hard as I could to return back to my family. Come to think of it, I think I somehow figured out what category of people I belonged to but I'm not exactly sure.

Talked about my previous, I'm not sure whether jing ting read it. Ok, that is a good comment for me to reanalyse myself. Yes, I'm may have assumed that I'm correct but I did not. Somehow, you hit the spot, I may have a little communication problem there.

Well, I should just let the case rest, I should just get back to myself. I think recently I've been awkwardly trying to be a person I wasn't supposed to be. It's a weird question I've got to regroup my senses, restructure my thinking system, reanalyse myself. Morgan and jonathan, I've been in a rampage recently, thanks for the advice, I should just be myself. But on the other hand I need to think whether it affects other peoples' thought towards me. It may be right to quote from you morgan, "there are just too many different types of people out there, some click, some don't, just be yourself" Somehow myself had been, displayed to be eccentric, too friendly, too crude recently that people around may not be accustomed to it.

I just don't want don't want enemies, friends are hard to come by, acquintance is more a appropraite to define people passing in my life. Ross, I had not done that part in the assignment, self-esteem and self-fulfilling prophecy, maybe I'll try to do it. I hope you are not just another lecturer but you could be a friend, a consultant.

2009-06-05T19:27:00.002+08:00

Just finished my DWA checkpoint 1 today. Having Human Communication and WISP this morning and afternoon respectively. Today's H Comm's discussion is on group communication, this kinda make me want to think that, why people can be a little more friendly when doing project but it's another case outside of class. It is like a total person. Is this because of grades or something? Somehow, if this kind of situation happeto ns, it makes me think that, one should know the consequences of offending a teammate. This is not being hostile in any sense, if one is smart enough to analyse, it shall be something valuable. Since I started working, I had received a lot of teachings from my boss. There are lessons that are valuable, there are things that should be observed. I came to realised that having a good rapport with teammates in and outside class will improve the quality of work delivered. E.g. My friendship with my colleagues actually brings me benefit. I assumed that it is always a human characteristic to work well under a environment with suitable environment objects(human or others) that is comfortable. This is getting a little opinionated and biased.

It had been a long time since I've been trying to scan through my brains for stuffs that are complicated. I've always enjoyed myself trying to think hard, ok maybe not so hard but I like to think up to a number of ways an event can happened. Where did I go wrong? Where did I say wrong? Is there biasness in that person? Is there any kind of dislike/grudge in that person. All these subjects are very intriguing. Someday,somehow I really wished to explore into something like. Do you ever wished that you can have telepathic ability? Actually, for my case, the ability to read a person's mind is enough for me. It is more than enough to achieve great things. But everything has its pros and cons, somehow, in the near futures, 'mutants' will appear. It may be a situation like the X-men movie. I'm waiting patiently for that moment to come, it may be a moment of glory or chaos. On the bottomline, it is just my fantasy. I do really wished to understand people, to know what people are thinking of. I don't really get it when people starts to get hostile even I'm talking in a very joking manner, no serious tone things just got ugly. Maybe there is dislike or maybe I speak a wrong thing, but it wasn't insulting anyway right? So why not be easy and not so hostile.

The more I write, I more I wished to find out the behavior of humans. How and why and what actually causes resentment. I'm talking more on resentment because it is something I have more relate to. The questions starts coming to my mind. I'm wondering why humans will get desolate or cautious. Is it because there is a past event that resulted? Or is it just the personality. Either wise, I believe that past events can change a person's character or personality. I really wished to find an answer to my questions, maybe someone or some being will be able to answer that.

Disclaimer : All the above materials are not specifically referred to or is it intention, it is just a triggered inspiration. Credit for triggering this post, H comm lecturer, a certain acquintance who shall not be name(sounds dangerous), indeed everyone who speaks to me recently has triggered me to write up something.

2009-05-28T14:08:00.006+08:00

Jeff Hardy's Entrance Music
Endeverafter - No More Words

I got a sharp stick, I keep in my pocket
I speak volumes never utter a word
When you strike a match, a fire will happen
But the line between the smoke and the flames get blured

Don't you see the writing on the wall(Don't you see the writing on the wall)
You're in way over your head
You're gonna drown in the things that you said

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
But words are cheap, but lies are faint to me

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
And all your words are too big to take

It's a paradox, A mystery, A riddle
A door in your face and only I have the key
Do understand, you'll be caught in the middle
Caught in a web by being spun by me

Don't you see the writing on the wall (Don't you see the writing on the wall)
Just a victim of your own conceit
The architect of your own defeat

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
But words are cheap, but lies are meant faint to me

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
And all your words are too big to take

Never walk away from a fight that's worth fighting
Never hesitate when you know you're gonna act
Never waste your words on a fool who won't listen
Never sell your soul cause you'll never buy it... back

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
But words are cheap, but lies are faint to me

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
And all your words are too big to take

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
But words are cheap, but lies are faint to me

Time has come and gone for words
A thousands threats I've heard before
And all your words are too big to take

This is so meaningful, Never Run away from a fight, Never Hesitate, Never Waste Your Words, Never Sell Your Soul...

2009-05-27T22:36:00.002+08:00

People who loves spicy food is so gonna try this otah from the pasar malam now at bukit panjang...RECOMMENDED FISH HEAD OTAH!!!
Woah! I'll never fail to get this whenever I go to the pasar malam...the japanese salmon pizza, who knows how to make this, I'm so gonna thank you for teaching me, anyone?

2009-05-24T12:31:00.000+08:00

This is what happens on sunday, woke up at 8 am by my dear grandma to go brisk walking with. Wa Lau eh!!! So Kiasu for what!? Freaking 8am, so ya, went for the walk then back to sleep

2009-05-23T17:44:00.003+08:00

That's all for today,lazy to say anything...

2009-05-21T23:44:00.003+08:00

Woah! Felt the fire...I know that fire...familiar with it... It once burns in me but not anymore...least not as often...

What am I implying... I used have hot-temper(don't challenge it), my close friends know. Now, I really feel your pain friends. How it feels to have timebomb around you (make myself clear,not referring to specific person)

Well...Objective of this post, is just to remind hot-tempered or short-fused people that it really doesn't pays to be like this. I've been there, done that. It just irks me to think back how exactly it is to blow up. Specifically Morgan, Wei Yang, Yi Jie, Jia Xuan, Han Siang.

Thank you people for really helping curb my temper back then in the old days...

2009-05-21T15:59:00.002+08:00

My Barley this morning

My Bread with Eggs

It has been a long time since I've had this. I don't usually like eating breakfast.

Work loads has been getting rather heavy recently especially I had to take WISP. Do you know how much I hate politics? Let alone studying/researching them.

2009-05-19T09:13:00.001+08:00

Hey! Smokers around...don't you see that the environment is hazy enough yet continue to smoke?

2009-05-17T12:11:00.003+08:00

The days where I go partying,slacking with friends had been over by a year I only had this pathetic egg that I fried yesterday on my own. I can't believe I can actually land in this state. Now, I'm begining to miss the working days where I went joking around with my colleagues... well, disturbing the girls...Going to big events, Mediacorp events, watching movies stars at functions. It is so cool to be able to do that and yet I didn't really realise how good my job can be. But now, assignments are really giving me the headache, and yes, my repeat modules, DB & DWA, I'm so scared la...I really really want to pass them with good grades at least a B+ . I wonder whether I'm able to make it. Next,it is about my IS modules WISP and Human Communication. This two modules has assignments that require 5 pages of report, I really hate reseaching and writing reports. I really wished my life is a little bit more colourful. Why!!! Why my parents have to divorce. DAD! Do you know how it SUCKS to have to work not because of extra pocket money but to really support my LIVING!

I'm only 19 this year!!! I want to ENJOY! I'm starting to believe a little in destiny. Is it really how much you get depends on what you reaped in your previous life OR is it that the ("GODS" or "Karma") just makes spots of me? I am extremely frustrated with my current life situation. I wished I am able to turn back time and correct all the things I've failed to do. I have been a very bad son, a very bad brother. I wished I could do something about it. I just want my life simple. Assignments little, able to party with friends, able to drink, able to communicate better with others. This is what little hopes that I have for now. DAD! Because of you! You made me so miserable! And how dare you say you raised me for 16 years, if so, I died 3 years ago. I should not be here anymore.

DON'T YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW YOUR SONS WILL BE WHEN YOU DO THE THINGS YOUR WAY!? DON'T YOU THINK ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES!? YOU THINK THE MONEY YOU SENT OVER FROM AUSTRALIA WILL BE ENOUGH!?

DON'T YOU NEVER EVER ASK ME TO DO ANYMORE THINGS, I'LL BE DAMN PISSED LIKE I AM NOW.

2009-05-16T12:38:00.002+08:00

Asked to do this Quiz by Wan Qing
Write the names of 21 people you can think off the top of your head , Then answer the questions.
1. Ang Wei Lun
2. Morgan
3. Jia Xuan
4. Francine
5. Wan Qing,Hazel
6. Jia Yu
7. Jia Jin
8. Wei Yang
9. Beverly
10. Yi Jie
11. Vincent Goh Keng An
12. Goh Keng Leong
13. You Er
14. Wilson Lai
15. Joey Cheah
16. Amos Ng
17. Chua Swee Guan
18. Galvin
19. Qiu Xuan
20. Wei Mei
21. Dennis Chua

How did you get to meet 7 ? Jia Jin
Jia Xuan's Sister?

What would you do if you and 15 never met? Joey
Missed some fun moments I think

What would you do if 1 and 20 date? Wei Lun,Wei Mei
I don't think that would ever happen

Have you ever seen 17 cry? Swee Guan
Don't think so,he only complains

Would 4 and 16 be a good couple? Francine & Amos
Maybe, amos a good guy...

Do you think 11 is attractive? Vincent
Only girls answer this...

What's 2's favourite colour? Morgan
Darker Than Black...

When was the last time you talked to 9? Beverly
Yesterday

What language does 8 speak? Wei Yang
English & Chinese, & his Yanglish

Who is 13 going out with? You Er
Desmond Chua

What grade is 12 in? Keng Leong
Secondary 3

Would you ever date with 17? Swee Guan
Stop this quiz Now!!!! Nonsense!

Where does 18 live? Galvin
Pending...I Think....

What's the best thing about 3? Jia Xuan
Her Innocence and 'Blurness'!!! haha!!!

What would you want to tell 10 now? Yi Jie
Eh...I don't know

Whats the best thing about 20? Wei Mei
I don't know, maybe I'll google!!!haha!!!

Have you ever kissed 5? Wan Qing
Well, no...but don't mind dating...lol....

What was the best memory you have with 21? Dennis Chua
The Spongebob Squarepants's Patrick's Double!!!

When's the last time you're going to see 6? Jia Yu
Last Month....Kind of forgot...

How is 14 and 12 different? Wilson and Keng Leong
Wilson is friendm keng leong is cousin

Is 19 pretty? Qiu Xuan
Yes

What was the first impression of 11? Vincent
Nerd...used to wear specs in past mar...

How did you meet 20? Wei Mei
Zhenghua Science Club? Through Soon Teck?

Is 1 your best friend? Weil Lun
Yeah! But I still freaking hate his temper

Do you hate 12? Keng Leong
What you think? He can be irritating at times...

Have you seen 18 on the last month? Galvin
Long Time No See

When was the last time you said to 16? Amos
Hi! How Are You!

Have you been to 5's house? Wan Qing
No...though she just live nearby

When's the next time you gonnna see 10? Yi Jie
Probably next week...

Are you close to 13? You Er
In the past...

Have you ever been to a movie with 4 before? Francine
I forgot...

Have you ever gotten into trouble with 8? Wei Yang
Definitely!

Would you give 19 a hug? Qiu Xuan
If she permits....lol....

When have you lied to 3? Jia Xuan
I'm a nice guy!!!

Is 16 good with socializing? Amos
I don't know

Do you know secrets about 9? Beverly
I don't keep any...

Describe the relationship between 12 and 14. Keng Leong & Wilson
they don't know each other

Best thing about your friendship with 9? Beverly
I don't know

What's the worst thing about 6? Jia ?Yu
I don't know

Have you ever had a crush on 12? Keng Leong
Bullshit! his my male cousin

14 has a girlfriend or boyfriend? Wilson
I'm not sure though...

Have you ever wanted to punch 1's face? Wei Lun
I already did...

Has 21 met your mother? Dennis
Yes

How did you get to meet 15? Joey
At zhenghua CC

Did you ever physically hurt 3? Jia Xuan
I said I'm a nice guy!!!

Do you live close to 7? Jia Jin
Definitely, singapore is so small!!!

What's 8's favourite food? Wei Yang
He's 1 bastard that keeps everything to himself

What kind of car does 1 has? Wei Lun
Not Yet

Have you travelled anywhere with 9 before? Beverly
what's your definition of travel? to lot 1?

If you give 14 $100 , what will he/she spend it on? Wilson
Clothes I guessed...

2009-05-13T22:00:00.003+08:00

I took the quiz "which of your chakra is the most open" on face book and I got this Heart Chakra therefore I got curious making a little research on my own.Here it is.

Heart Chakra also known as Anahata

Anahata (Sanskrit: अनाहत, Anāhata) is the fourth primary chakra according to the Hindu Yogic and Tantric (Shakta) traditions.

In Sanskrit the word anahata - means unhurt, un-struck and unbeaten. Anahata Nad refers to the Vedic concept of unstruck sound, the sound of the celestial realm.

The Anahata chakra is physically positioned at the heart region. Traditionally, this chakra is represented as a green flower with twelve petals which match the vrittis of lust, fraud, indecision, repentance, hope, anxiety, longing, impartiality, arrogance, incompetence, discrimination and defiance.

Anahata is associated with the ability to make decisions outside of the realm of karma. In Manipura and below, man is bound by the laws of karma, and the fate he has in store for him. In Anahata, one is making decisions, 'following your heart', based upon one's higher self, and not from the unfulfilled emotions and desires of lower nature. The Anahata seed sound is yam. The wish-fulfilling tree, kalpa taru, resides here, symbolizing the ability to manifest whatever you wish to happen in the world.

It is also associated with love and compassion, charity to others, and forms of psychic healing.
Anahata is the seat of the Jivatman, and Para Shakti.

References:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anahata

2009-05-10T20:41:00.003+08:00

My 大姨would probably kill for this.(eating crab)

Mummy!!! and Ezreen Gor

To the left,youngest cousin(Jun Xiang) and Ngee Ann freshie cousin(Keng An)

Tan Jun Xiang!

Put Down Your Phone! Stop playing!

Waiting....

Fucked Up Face....

Jun Rui,Why are you grinning?

Eh! Pai Kia Ar!

Before leaving,grandpa in car

My Pai Kia Brother

Mum again.

Haha! Finally stole a snapshot of grandma!

Most probably the most pic post of my blog,I guessed. I'm full, really full. I only had 2 plates of rice and some crabs and small bites here...there, but I'm full. This is ridiculous.Well, this year's food is not bad except for the fish. A little bit spoilt I think or sour.

2009-05-10T08:55:00.001+08:00

Happy Mothers Day to all on this universe.(that's as far as this may go) Well, nothing's special I think, eating out somewhere I think. Still worrying about assignments la!

2009-05-08T20:02:00.002+08:00

I regret to exist
I regret to live
I regret to be nice
I regret to be stupid
I regret to be idiotic
I regret to be good
I regret to be a listener
I regret to comfort others
I regret to not have participate in much school activities
I regret to not making more friends
I regret to have high tolerance
I regret to change my temper
I regret to change my attitude
I regret to fail my modules
I regret to not study well
I regret to have no authority over my brother
I regret to letting my brother dropout
I regret to being a bad brother
I regret to being friendly

I regret life!!!

I regret being ME!!!

I wished I was Forge

I wished I was Hiro Nakamura

I wished to be a mutant

2009-05-07T14:24:00.002+08:00

Current Mood : Pissed/Ruined
Reason : Freaking Internet.

I...I...I don't like to rant on my blog but WHAT THE #$%^ is wrong with the internet today. Whether it is internet traffic or physical traffic, EVERYTHING,REALLY EVERYTHING IS SLOW. This is freaking making me going mad. Facebook crapped out, everything slow!!! I don't like this slow. I want FAST!FAST!FAST! **** IT!

2009-05-06T18:41:00.002+08:00

Thinking of it...it had been quite a long time since I've been to movies. I'm so yearning to go to the movies, it is like, well,anyone? I mean really anyone that knows me willing to ask me out to watch movie. I'll agree right away.

2009-05-06T18:34:00.001+08:00

Haiz...Today is such a beautiful day, that made me so sleepy! Boring WT,boring DWA today. Mr Tan, can you not be so dull?

2009-05-06T00:57:00.003+08:00

Ok, Just 1 question. How do I portray myself as meaning no harm? Well,if I really offended anybody through the use of improper expression of the words I'm trying to convey. I really don't know how salvage the situation.

I'm just trying to play a nice guy. Don't close your door on me. I know some people can be rather anti. I don't what might be the reason. I just wanted to find out a little more so as to facilitate better communication. This is just as simple as this. (I'm just ranting at myself not directed) This is getting a little bit tough on my side as I feel I'm a little outcast from my current DB team. Just let time prove...if I'm strongly being rejected then I shall not go any further.

2009-05-06T00:41:00.001+08:00

Evolution is a mystery
Full of change that no one sees
Clock makes a fool of history
Yesterday's so long ago, don't agree with what I know.
Tomorrow becomes a place to be.

I see the line in the sand
Time to find out who I am
Looking back to see where I stand
Evolution
Evolution

See my reflection change
Nothing ever stays the same
But you know the names The Game
We all know what it means
Nothings ever what it seems
Unforgiven, unforseen

I see the line in the sand
Time to find out who I am
Looking back to see where I stand
Evolution
Evolution

Take it back home...

2009-05-02T01:41:00.002+08:00

Woah! What time is it now. Let's see... 1.42 am, It's sure had been a long long time I came home so late since the good old times. Well, maybe I'm the only one stuck in old times, but a certain moodswing let me think "who cares! Who need friends anyway, just a useless bunch of people to go out with to kill your time" , maybe I can jolly well still be very comfortable without friends. There goes the introduction of the human communication module, though we had not went in depth but I have question myself, "Will I really die if I don't communicate". Erm, I think there's no definite answer. This had to depend on how each may think and what is the definition of communication(which not even a single living person can define)

Ya, think of it as a "Labour" Day instead of Labour Day. See the difference? One quoted, One not quoted. Yes, today is "labour" day for me. Work the **** hell out of me. The function is at Orchard outside Takashimaya. Orchard's Longest Catwalk 2009 if I remembered correctly. I'm not enjoying the fashion show, I'm working; and that makes a total difference when you are working or relaxing. I think I'm gonna die from this job sooner or later before the so-called world's end.

It's a hot topic, everyone's talking about it. For me, I think it's crap. Pardon me if I really offended any of the "Great One"s' out there. You know why I did said it's crap because I believe the world will end if humanity is no longer in existence. I don't mean humankind, I mean humanity. Maybe I'm a little naggy about my posts recently but I just have to type more as only morgan could understand what I write. What about the others. Although my english is not that good but I've grown to be specific with my words. As to some extend, everything I wrote or speak needs to be thought carefully. Oh well, maybe not for the spoken all the time.

If the world is ever gonna end, what shall I do?

Do what I suppose to do? Find a lady and ****?
Sit right there and bide my time?
Do the "holy" thing, pray?

Well, I don't think everybody even have time to react to the crisis just like what happened to the dinos.

A new year resolution

2009-04-30T17:41:00.002+08:00

Well,I'm back to blogging. Erm,I guess... It doesn't matter anyway.2nd week is finally over and its a pretty fast week.I'm still relaxed somehow but I had no chioce but to keep myself focus,it's a gamble; ALL or NOTHING. No matter what, be it girls, results, or my life I have to keep myself motivated. Maybe, I said maybe the last sentence is a little...offensive. It had been a long way to come to reach Year 3 although I will not graduate at the same rate as my fellow friends and classmate because I owe 2 modules. I am relieve and contented that I am given a second chance, a whole new chapter in life.

Well, let's say I only know 5 person in the new class. Namely Jing Ting,Qiu Xuan,Yu Teng,Ching Hwee and Ester. Anyway, I'm happy to know them and yes, another thing it's about the grouping, I don't mind being in any group or even without group, so just let them decide whether to kick me out and away or to let me be a little "beneficial" to the group. Yes, not seen wrongly, I said "beneficial". I jolly well know that I'm a repeat student SO it is common for people to think "this guy must have done badly last semester" or "this guy must be not very active in a group last year" . Well, I partly admitted to the latter I'm a little laid-back last semester but this is a new semester, a new year, new classmates, (well,not yet friends, I'm still not sure whether I'm accepted and welcomed or not) , so there goes new resolution, new goals, and 'new girls'. Ha! I quoted that, I'm just joking about the quoted part, or maybe see how things get by later in the year.(No, that shouldn't happen, a little low-self confidence here but it's a fact)

Yes, new goals

Get A or probably a high B
Attitude Adjustment for me and for all ( I mean I want let Chiu see a difference)
A very first girlfriend ( Not really achievable, then only higher beings know)

我相信有志者，事竟成
只要持之以恒，铁棒也能磨成针

真金不怕火炼！我要比火还猛，比石头还更厚脸皮，比砖石还耐

能实现吗？因该可以吧...

2009-04-29T11:14:00.001+08:00

WTF!WTF!WTF! Should not have completed the entire DWA work before class! I'm so like BORED right now!

许志安-<为什么你背着我爱别人>

2009-04-27T18:10:00.001+08:00

想着你的脸空虚的脸
麻木的走在崩溃边缘
我需要可以流泪的花园
灌溉这朵枯萎的诺言
最心爱的情人却伤害我最深
为什么你背着我爱别人
女人天真的眼神藏着冷酷的针
人生看不清却奢望永恒
哦软弱的灵魂已陷入太深
早已冷却的吻藏在心中加温
爱情充满残忍我却太认真
爱一层层被撕裂
我一层层被摧毁被爱摧毁
我来不及找到出口
我一层层被摧毁
狠不下心
向黑夜
说再见

2009-04-26T23:23:00.003+08:00

WELL,Erm,红心大奖2009 is another crappish 小娘惹大奖, And ya,congrats to Lavish Dine Catering Pte Ltd for clinching the deal although I didn't work today deal to homework. Doesn't matter, there will be a lot of other chances...erm...I'm senior OK! Haha,"haolian" a while.

2009-04-26T18:00:00.002+08:00

This is getting ridiculous that I've been wanting to post this since quite a while ago. Ok,I shouldn't be ranting or being too possesive but where did all my good friends gone to. It's been weeks since I've not met them.Well,I understand that you all had been busy with school,FYP,attachment of sorts...but have you forgotten this old friend? Sorry if you are offended but those that supposed will read you should know that I don't always blog about this kind of ridiculous thing such as abandoning friends or what but Hey! I'm fucking bored and I CANT TOLERATE IT. I've tried to contact but WTF did I hear from YOU! Ok,this is getting agitated. I think I'm going back to total isolation,自毙 if this carries on any longer. I'll just as well remove all my contacts from my phone and unsubscribe it. O@#R#%6@#$! aRgH! It's killing me! I'll fall into a deep slumber soon enough. And Die!

2009-04-05T23:23:00.001+08:00

Greed:	Medium
Gluttony:	Medium
Wrath:	High
Sloth:	High
Envy:	Medium
Lust:	Medium
Pride:	Very High

The Seven Deadly Sins Quiz on 4degreez.com

Pics Speaks,I don't speak

2009-04-05T22:28:00.007+08:00

2009-03-11T00:00:00.002+08:00

家家有本难念的经 AKA (by han siang) "home home has a book of difficult to read scripture", that was what made laugh like as if I'm mad.

Aww...

2009-02-23T06:42:00.002+08:00

Too many bad things,good things happening recently, I don't know which 1 to start with. Aww...Lazy to cook, grandma hospitalised. For some reason she collapse before entering the clinic doctor's door so ambulanced to NUH. Bah,the second time in a single time, I've been there, it is so "suay,suay,suay,suay,suay!!! la"! Well,having common test today and the day after tomorrow. "Damn!!!" 'Super' memory work again.

2009-02-16T12:17:00.002+08:00

Ok,I'm going to end off very easy about today. It's jessie's birthday today,my neighbour's kid. Well,tmr J gonna be sent off to somewhere far so went dwn, handed 'e "silver" and offered a joss. then end of day

Valentine's again...

2009-02-15T00:31:00.002+08:00

Yeah...nostalgic. What is this day for anyway? Who invented it? How it came about? Don't tell me, don't want to know. For now,at least... it is a day with new meaning. Yeah...a day with no dates, no girlfriend as usual for 19 years, ya, 7 days ago I'm just 19 and that just don't make a difference. In fact, I don't remember what is the day...till then...wondering...or forgetting....don't bother....

2009-02-07T02:17:00.002+08:00

As I expected,"yes! I'm 19 today!","erm,nobody cares..."Just let it be,its the same every year, I somehow will start to think about something no very right. In the other perspective, it is not, as well, "who cares about remembering others birthday and give them presents when they don't, they even treated you as if you are delivered by some crane instead of having a birthday, they can completely forget about it" That is for friends...friends...really...

....really! Damn! Why am I complaining on a stupid blog when everybody can read and they know exactly who I am refering.

Nevertheless,
Wish 1 : A birthday Cake
Wish 2 : Be in the company of the person I love for my next birthday alone.
Wish 3 : More wishes for pending wishes.

Rubbish, cP' you are typing garbage, you are thinking nonsense, you are talking crap!!!

Ok,shall I be back to blogging

2009-02-04T13:45:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year! Whether there is audience or not, I don't care, anyway just saying it to my blog is enough. I can't feel any festivity this year, "I don't know why"

It's been a moment since I had written a long post, I don't think I can now. One reason, I've got nothing I wished or I particularly want to talk about. A week had past, my grandma just came back from "holiday", yes good days are over though I don't need to worry about what I shall be preparing for dinner everyday.

Haiz, I don't know if anybody ever notices my birthday even if I say it out loud, nevermind just let it be.

2009-01-31T12:43:00.001+08:00

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid Disorder:	Moderate
Schizoid Disorder:	Moderate
Schizotypal Disorder:	High
Antisocial Disorder:	High
Borderline Disorder:	Moderate
Histrionic Disorder:	High
Narcissistic Disorder:	Very High
Avoidant Disorder:	Moderate
Dependent Disorder:	High
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! -- -- Personality Disorders --

Decode,Twilight Theme by paramore

2009-01-22T12:50:00.001+08:00

Lyrics

2009-01-02T23:48:00.002+08:00

Our PhotographerTry Hard!

Jia you! joey!

Go!Go!Go!

The Durian we called esplanade

A day at marina square(region...)

2009-01-02T23:10:00.002+08:00

First thing,yes,sorry wilson,I'm late. I mistaken 1pm to be 2pm so I reached at 2pm. When I reached,morgan was having his lunch/breakfast at macdonalds.(As usual,I won't order anything.)

So after morgan's meal,we went over to board a MRT to city hall. We reach city hall at around 3pm+ to meet joey and carlos,where the most boring thing for me started.(Shopping...ok,only morgan knows that I loathe shopping).

Well,the shopping goes on for (buddha knows how long...)till about 6pm+,started at around 6.30pm.

While I'm eating,a familiar figure walked past(not what you are thinking). Then I stand a little to confirm, then I told morgan I saw 1 of my ex-colleague,then he started blabbering, which 1? The checkered 1,the...(I forgot what he said). It's the checkered 1, Morgan : "not bad, 有眼光".(lol,she has a boyfriend la,for goodness sake,don't think there.)

After the meal, morgan and I went to board a bus while wilson and joey went to MRT. When we were on the bus, I am talking about peiqin, (ok,peiqin if you read this, I wasn't stalking you,lol...) I said to morgan that she is 1 of my ex-colleague cause I don't see her around at lavish anymore. She had cut to short hair,but I think she looks better with the previous long hair but morgan said she looks well with both.

Ok,blah,blah,blah,morgan alight at school,I alight at BP,then home sweet home.

That's It

End here

A Blog Post

2009-01-01T14:46:00.002+08:00

Well,this is the 1st of January 2009.2.46pm.

Ok,I tell you what shall be my first post of the year.Somehow I forgot about something known as a new year resolution,I seemed to have missed it for years.

What shall I be doing this year? Erm...Isn't everything gonna be the same! except the date,my age...and the...Ok,what is the difference! Lol! This is bringing me no where,I've no idea what the heck am I posting. Well,maybe it's as jia xuan suggested I am very,very,very,very lame(she used 4 "very" in her blog post). Ya,here I am again at my blog spouting nonsensical things again.

Maybe...I'll get a girlfriend this year....(no,it's not a good idea)Maybe....I'll start a business this year and earn big money...(hey there! Stop dreaming! You're only 19 soon,aRe YoU jOkInG!?)

Haha,I think I shall end this post,there's nothing much to talk about.

This is 1 of the chain e-mail I find meaningful

2008-12-29T00:14:00.001+08:00

Nobody is perfect until you fall in love with them.
Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear.
Don't cry over anyone who won't cry over you.
What do you do when the only person who can make you stop crying is the person who made you cry?
If love isn't a game, why are there so many players?
Good friends are hard to find, harder to leave, and impossible to forget.
You can only go as far as you push!
Actions speak louder than words.
The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love somebody else.
Don't let the past hold you back, you're missing the good stuff.
Life's short. If you don't look around once in a while you might miss it.
A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find and lucky to have.
Some people make the world special by just being in it.
Best friends are the siblings God forgot to give us.
When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.
True friendship never ends.
Friends are forever.
Good friends are like stars....you don't always see them, but you know they are always there.
Don't frown, you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
Everything is okay in the end. If it's not okay, then it's not the end. Most people walk in and out of your life, but only friends leave footprints in your heart.
If u love something...let it go.
If it comes back to you its yours....
If it doesn't then it never was.
A kiss is just a kiss until u find the one you love. A hug is just a hug>until its from the one ur thinking of. A dream is just a dream until u make it come true. LOVE is just a word until its proven 2 u.
Send this on to everyone special in your life, even the people who really make you mad sometimes. Remember, every minute spent angry is sixty seconds of happiness wasted.
____________________________________
To realize
The value of a sister
Ask someone
Who doesn't have one.

To realize
The value of ten years:
Ask a newly
Divorced couple.

To realize
The value of four years:
Ask a graduate.

To realize
The value of one year:
Ask a student who
Has failed a final exam.

To realize
The value of nine months:
Ask a mother who gave birth to a still born.

To realize
The value of one month:
Ask a mother
who has given birth to
A premature baby.

To realize
The value of one week:
Ask an editor of a weekly newspaper.

To realize
The value of one hour:
Ask the lovers who are waiting to Meet.

To realize
The value of one minute:
Ask a person
Who has missed the train, bus or plane.

To realize
The value of one-second:
Ask a person
Who has survived an accident...

To realize
T! he value of one millisecond:
Ask the person who has won a silver medal in the Olympics

Time waits for no one.

Treasure every moment you have.
You will treasure it even more when
you can share it with someone special.

To realize the value of a friend:
Lose one.

what Happened On The 23rd,let the pictures speak

2008-12-25T20:06:00.006+08:00

My Click
Happy Birthday!Seet Hao
Ok,not very right! haha
The Professional Singers,Darren,Ma Chang
Random

Random
Our Food!
Ruiping fanning the charcoal
Asraf! U look so joyous!
Random again
Ok,Our walking song dictionary
Random again

First,there is this class bbq session from 5pm to 9.30pm then to my click's bbq session,lasted whole night

I wished christmas is here...

2008-12-12T20:53:00.002+08:00

Full moon,dark skies,empty house...I'm getting bored.It's been quite a while since I have felt lonely.Today is the day when the shadows caped over me.Somehow I don't feel any friends around or perhaps the common test was just over for most.I want to take a break as well,but couldn't find replacement for work tomorrow.

2008-12-09T13:03:00.002+08:00

1. Who's the person that tagged you?
Joey

2. Relationship between you and him?
Freinds...? Junior...? Supposingly EMO friend! haha!

3. Three impressions of him?
Too EMO la!!!

4. If he becomes your enemy, you will?
Wouldn't care less

5. What will you say to the person you like very much?
Same old words don't need tell you right?

6. Characteristic I like about myself?
Can think...?

7. Characteristic I hate about myself?
Think too much...?

8. For the person whom you hate, you say?
Hello! Byebye!

9. What do people feel about you?
I don't know eh? Not my opinion of myself bah?

10. Your crush?
Well,yada yada yada...Nobody at the moment...

11. Pass this to 10 people.
1)Morgan
2)Wei Yang
3)Yi Jie
4)Jia Xuan
5)Wilson
6)Le xin
7)Joey
8)Wei Xiang
9)Boon Peng
10)You Er
12. If 5 & 7 were together?
(Wilson & Joey)
I don't know...lol...

13. Who does 5 like?
(Wilson)
Also don't know lei...he's looks somehow vain to me,himself?haha!

14. What colour does 9 like?
(Boon Peng)
Blue,Black,His shirt colours are only these...

15. Say something about 8?
(Wei Xiang)
Ok,Very Good Friend...

16. Who is 2?
(Wei Yang)
Stalker?

17. Talk about 3.
(Yi Jie)
The decisive,finance-oriented,...I'll think of more

18. Who is 10's best friend?
(You Er)
Kerin?Have I spelt wrongly don't blame me

19. Who's the sexiest among all 10?
(-)
Erm...

20. What colour does 4 like?
(Jia Xuan)
Pink?

21. Is 4 single?
For the moment...

22. Your relationship with 1?
(Morgan)
An understanding,joyful,thoughtful.A friend that I can depend on...

24. 9's surname?
Ng Boon Peng

25. 7's nickname?
(Joey)
Joe-Wee!!!

26. Say something to 8.
(Wei Xiang)
Hey! Friend,where have you been? MIA for so long

27. Say something to help 9.
(Boon Peng)
Don't be so engross in dota lah! Just a game!

28. Who does 1 admire?
He haven't told me this month lei

29. Where does 1 live?
Teck Whye

30. 10 of them know who you like?
Erm,Let them answer this?

31. Say something to 6 when you see him/her.
(le xin)
Hi!你好!

32. 10's spouse?
Desmond Chua

My DWA...

2008-12-02T13:23:00.001+08:00

Ok,my DWA is going to repeat.yes,for sure,I know nothing of it,I've done nothing of it,I practically going to fail it...

Well...Long time since I went out

2008-12-02T12:41:00.001+08:00

Yep,went out with morgan and company yesterday,somehow I still had a little fever though

...

2008-12-02T12:15:00.001+08:00

Oh man! I think I'm gonna stay in school today just for the attendance,I'm stuck...

Indestructible...Recent obcession with this song

2008-11-07T08:43:00.002+08:00

Another mission
The powers have called me away
Another time
To carry the colors again
My motivation
An oath I’ve sworn to defend
To win the honor
Of coming back home again
No explanation
Will matter after we begin
Another dark destroyer that’s buried within
My true vocation
And now my unfortunate friend
You will discover
A war you’re unable to win

I'll have you know
That I’ve become…

Indestructible
Determination that is incorruptible
From the other side
A terror to behold
Annihilation will be unavoidable
Every broken enemy will know
That their opponent had to be invincible
Take a last look around while you’re alive
I’m an indestructible master of war

Another reason
Another cause for me to fight
Another fuse uncovered
Now, for me to light
My dedication
To all that I’ve sworn to protect
I carry out my orders
With not a regret
A declaration
Embedded deep under my skin
A permanent reminder
Of how we began
No hesitation
When I am commanded to strike
You need to know
That you’re in for the fight of your life

You will be shown
How I've become....

Indestructible
Determination that is incorruptible
From the other side
A terror to behold
Annihilation will be unavoidable
Every broken enemy will know
That their opponent had to be invincible
Take a last look around while you’re alive
I’m an indestructible master of war

I'm...

Indestructible
Determination that is incorruptible
From the other side
A terror to behold
Annihilation will be unavoidable
Every broken enemy will know
That their opponent had to be invincible
Take a last look around while you’re alive
I am indestructible (indestructible)

Indestructible
Determination that is incorruptible
From the other side
A terror to behold
Annihilation will be unavoidable
Every broken enemy will know
That their opponent had to be invincible
Take a last look around while you’re alive
I’m an indestructible master of war

Indestructible - Disturbed

New Semester!!!....

2008-10-13T09:13:00.002+08:00

First of all,2nd year 2nd semester,ok,what I'm gonna do...
First.Nothing
Second.Nothing
Third.Nothing
So on and so forth.

Ok,here's to reply joshua,erm,ya,my blogs dead,I'm juz had nothing to write about nothing interesting,nothing fantastic,nothing worth pondered over so I've stop this blog quite a time. Haiz,what should I write then...dead...stopping here...

Back to maintain a bit

2008-08-20T09:33:00.002+08:00

It's been a long time since I'm back here blogging, to the fact that I'm getting lazy-er and lazy-er as time pass.Well,nothing much exciting really happened to me,now it's in exam period again but I'm not in a very 'study' mood u see.haiz....

2008-07-07T12:57:00.000+08:00

曲名：我是真的付出我的爱
唱：周华健词：周华健
别走开给我一个时间对你说爱
手触着心缓缓呼吸
深深地感觉心在说我爱你
哦宝贝给我一个时间对你说爱
用我的心化做星星
填满你寂寞的夜里
从来不曾有过这样的感觉
迫切渴望拥有每一个永远
就让转动的世界停留在眼前
让我对你说对你说
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後不会再更改
哦让我拥有你到未来
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後就不会再更改
让我拥有你全部的爱
别走开给我一个时间对你说爱
手触着心缓缓呼吸
深深地感觉心在说我爱你
哦宝贝给我一个时间对你说爱
用我的心化做星星
填满你寂寞的夜里
从来不曾有过这样的感觉
迫切渴望拥有每一个永远
就让转动的世界停留在眼前
让我对你说对你说
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後不会再更改
哦让我拥有你到未来
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後就不会再更改
让我拥有你全部的爱
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後不会再更改
哦让我拥有你到未来
我是真的付出我的爱
从今以後就不会再更改
让我拥有你全部的爱

我是真的付出我的爱.mp3 - 周华健

梦到哪里，你都在，叫我怎么忘怀

2008-07-01T13:21:00.003+08:00

我现在的心情，我的歌
就是这首歌

你把我灌醉
歌手：黄大炜

开往城市边缘开把车窗都摇下来
用速度换来一点痛快孤单被热闹的夜赶出来
却无从告白是你留给我悲哀
哦爱让我变得看不开
哦爱让我自找伤害
你把我灌醉你让我流泪
扛下了所有罪我拼命挽回
你把我灌醉你让我流泪爱得收不回
唔……
猜最好最坏都猜
你为何离开可惜永远没有答案
对我你爱的太晚又走的太快
我的心你不明白
我梦到哪里
你都在怎么能忘怀
你那神秘的笑脸是不是说
放不下你是我活该

你把我灌醉.mp3 -

Shadow of the day,the sun will set for you,thus my heart will die too...

2008-05-21T13:36:00.002+08:00

I close both locks below the window.
I close both blinds and turn away.
Sometimes solutions aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
And the sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you...

In cards and flowers on your window,
Your friends all plead for you to stay.
Sometimes beginnings aren't so simple.
[ Shadow Of The Day lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.

And the sun will set for you,
And the sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in gray,
And the sun will set for you..

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in gray,
And the sun will set for you..

And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in gray,
And the sun will set for you.

我就像洋葱。就像这首歌

2008-05-14T08:57:00.002+08:00

洋葱

如果你眼神能够为我
片刻的降临
如果你能听到
心碎的声音
沉默的守护著你
沉默的等奇迹
沉默的让自己
像是空气
大家都吃著聊著笑著
今晚多开心
最角落里的我
笑得多合群
盘底的洋葱像我
永远是调味品
偷偷的看著你
偷偷的隐藏著自己
如果你愿意一层一层一层的剥开我的心
你会发现你会讶异
你是我最压抑
最深处的秘密
如果你愿意一层一层一层的剥开我的心
你会鼻酸你会流泪
只要你能听到我
看到我的全心全意
听你说你和你的他们
暧昧的空气
我和我的绝望
装得很风趣
我就样一颗洋葱
永远是配角戏
多希望能与你有一秒
专属的剧情

Well...your image haunts

2008-05-08T10:36:00.002+08:00

How many months had passed,make a guess...? I don't know either,seems like the only time I get to get in contact is when you wanted a "spare tire",the keyword "wanted",you see that. You know very well who you are,you still owe me $50.I haven't forgotten about you I still see your shadow behind...

2008-03-20T14:15:00.002+08:00

It's been so long since I last updated a post ; I can't even remember when did I last posted something. Well,what have I been doing all the while when I did not blog,I'm not rotting at home,I'm not dead,I'm working. Nearly everyday working that I don't even find time to update a post.

真的是好久了但是我还是没有忘记她，是把她当朋友也好或我喜欢的人也好，就是不会忘记她。
为你写诗
歌手：吴克群

爱情是一种怪事
我开始全身不受控制
爱情是一种本事
我开始连自己都不是
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是为你写诗
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了说最美的是你的名字
爱情是一种怪事
你的笑容是唯一宗旨
爱情是一种本事
我在你心里什么位置
为你我做了太多的傻事
第一件就是为你写诗
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了说最美的是你的名字
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你我学会弹琴写词
为你失去理智
为你写诗为你静止
为你做不可能的事
为你弹奏所有情歌的句子
我忘了说最美的是你的名字
我什么都能忘记
但唯一不忘记你的名字
我什么都能忘记
但唯一不忘记你的样子
我什么都